Dear Father I Never Knew,
Today is Father’s Day, but you probably already know that.
For most of my life, my thoughts rarely turned to you, except on Father’s Day.
It was easier that way.
It was easier not to wonder why a father would abandon his baby girl and the young mother left to take of her. It was easier not to consider why he wouldn’t look for her years later, when hopefully time and life experience would mature him.
There were questions, but few answers. There were no pictures. Sometimes there were tears and angry words. Other times there were dreams of a faceless daddy who would show up unexpectedly, with apologies and hugs and a big smile on his face, because he had finally found his long sought after girl.
I’ve looked for you off and on, with no success. Not often, but now and then. As the years go by and I think about you, I realize you are aging like the rest of us. Time is likely running out and the hopes of ever meeting you this side of heaven are fading with each passing day. And although it’s not likely you will ever read this, I feel the need to write it anyway.
Because I worry that you live with decisions you made with angst, I want you to know a few things.
I want you to know that I grew up surrounded by a loving family who believed in me, encouraged me to succeed in all I attempted, and taught me to work hard, be honest, and love my neighbor.
I want you to know I did well in school, went to college, have many amazing friends, a husband who does his best to provide a comfortable life for me, and a son who is just the most amazing blessing.
I want you to know I am loved.
And if I never do meet you in this life, I want you to know I love you because you gave me life and I believe that you love me, too, for the same reason. I believe you are sorry that you missed out on being my daddy.
I know that my birth and life were designed by the One who created me, for a purpose, and for His glory. It was no mistake that I was born. I believe wholeheartedly in Romans 8:28. I hope you do as well. I also want you to know that His grace is sufficient. It is sufficient for your heart, and for mine.
Today, I pray that you are alive and well, living a life free of guilt for past mistakes. I pray you are well-loved and that you know Jesus. I pray that you have other children who are honoring your life today. I pray that somewhere in the depths of your soul, you know that I forgive you.
Because I do.
Happy Father’s Day.
The Daughter You Never Knew