I’m taking my yearly blog hiatus for the month of September. In my absence, each Friday this month, a good friend and veteran homeschool mom will be sharing insights from their past experiences. I believe you will be inspired and blessed by what they have to share with you.
This week, please welcome Taunya, from Walking with Shiloh.
***
I remember the first day. Beep. Beep. Really? Already? Beep. Beep. Please Lord, just 5 more minutes. Hubby looks at me. Time to get up I hear him say. Beep. Beep. FINE. I’m getting up. I stumble to the bathroom, barely awake. After changing into my clothes, I stumble downstairs to wake sleepy kids. Miraculously, there’s no complaint. Lord, I’m scared. Am I going to be able to do this?
While eating breakfast I hear a familiar sound. They won’t be riding the bus this year. I peek at them. The 7th grader, the 4th grader and the 3rd grader. I whisper, please don’t mess this up.
We head outside for the traditional 1st day of school pictures. There’s no trek down the driveway with fresh jeans and backpacks. No first steps on the yellow bus. No sobbing momma as she walks slowly back to home. This day, we will be together.
We begin with the pledge and devotion. We move seamlessly through math, reading, writing and grammar. We start a study of our state’s history. Science becomes messy. There’s goop on the table, the floor and the pantry doors. Momma’s camera is snapping. We end the day with a walk to the neighborhood park. PE. That was easy. I got this!
We wave to friends getting off the bus. I catch my breath. It hurts a little to not have those first day talks about new desks, teachers and friends. This is going to be worth it. Just wait.
The first day turns into a week and then a month. The newness wears off. I am sick of prepositions. We already left the pledge behind. I’m failing. I don’t know how to do this.
My mind recalls the first days after my son was born. The way I would bounce from elation to defeat … confidence to doubt. Somehow, despite my fumbling, my son reached the milestones. The days became easier, my skin thicker. New phases brought new doubts, but I began to handle those with confidence. Motherhood melded with my identity.
Just as I stumbled through the first days of motherhood, I stumbled through the first year of homeschooling. There were successes and there were disasters. There was laughter and a ton of tears. Lessons finished and lessons skipped. Confidence grew and doubts subsided. I continued, one day at a time.
This fall we begin our fifth year of homeschooling. The kids are now in middle and high school. Gone are the days of spontaneous field trips and messy art projects. Learning has become more focused, school-like. I’d love to tell you that I have it all together. No doubts. No fears. I am absolutely confident. The truth is … I find myself asking once again, Can I do this?
I hear these words. “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Yes. I can do this.
I want to encourage us moms this year. We don’t need an education degree, a finely calculated schedule or a Pinterest-perfect classroom. We simply need Him. His grace is enough.